You Can’t Lose

Have you ever lost and later realized it was actually a victory for you?  This happened to me recently.  Even the folks who declared me the “loser” couldn’t even figure out why.  WHAT?!

As a human being, and one by the way who likes to win, this loss messed with me for several hours.  I couldn’t think of anything else.  My body wanted to lay down and curl up (which I allowed myself to do while finishing a novel who’s characters had lost far more than me.)  I played music that makes me  HAPPY on the CD player’s highest volume.  This must be what is considered “licking your wounds.”  Losing, or what looked like losing hurt.

The next morning I arose to a new day.  The angst of the defeat somehow no longer present in my mind or body.  I was a little surprise to realize that my mind wasn’t still playing the losing battle over and over like a needle stuck on an LP (for my younger readers, that’s what we listened to music on before the CD, MP3 and iPod.)  Then it hit me:  I HADN’T LOST.  What presented itself as a loss in every physical sense,  had somehow turned into a spiritual victory! 

There was no room for shame, or regret, anger or remorse.  I’d fought the good fight.   I’d maintained my integrity (when it would have been easier to meet my opponent in the muck and mire.)  I’d released the episode, acknowledging that sometimes my good comes packaged in something that at first appears to be not so good.  I’d allowed myself to grieve and then closed a chapter in my life.  Was this freedom I could feel from the top of my head to the tips of my toes?

So, the next time you look at ‘the score’ and see your name in the column marked “Loser”, look up.  Refuse to be reduced by what looks and feels like a loss.  Move toward the ultimate victory – peace – the kind that passes all understanding

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